confidence in uncertainty (and lots of tears)

mark 11.24

A lot of the time, I have no problem writing a post. It’s actually pretty easy; usually the idea just comes to me and I quickly jot a note in my ever-present iPhone. This past week, I have not had any ideas. None at all. So this is a post about absolutely nothing. I’m hoping that by the time it’s finished, there is some general theme, or at least a well constructed thought. We’ll see. Obviously, if you’re reading this, I thought it made enough sense to share. I will not be offended at all if you click the ‘x’ on your browser tab right now…. not in the least ;)

Anyone who knows me knows that I cry, often and at the drop of a hat. I ALWAYS cry when watching movies, even if they aren’t sad. The other day, I cried at work (these were very little tears, and didn’t exactly stream out of my eyes, I’ll call them work-appropriate tears). I work full-time for a family as both their nanny and at their dental practice. Neither of which should bring me to tears. I recently started helping assist the doctor during procedures. The other day, a patient’s wife saw her husband for the first time with a full mouth of teeth, after what must’ve been a very long time without them. She looked at him, smiled ear-to-ear, and told him how handsome he was. I had to excuse myself from the room because wouldn’t you think it was a little weird if the dental assistant was crying after your procedure? I thought it was so cool that a dentist could bring that much joy into someone’s life; and to my surprise, not only in the life of the patient. I’m quickly falling in love with dentistry and I am amazed at all the wonderful things Dr. Akroush is doing at Artistic Dentistry.

I think God is probably laughing right now, because when I started college and I was telling Him MY plans, they never included working in a dental office. They looked a lot more like: date, graduate, work a little, get married, have lots of babies…But I’m finding peace, and even joy, in the surprise of His plans. My prayer recently has been a lot of me telling God that I trust His plan and a lot of me asking God to help me trust His plan. The other day, I was googling (which should totally be an actual verb by now) prayers for a future spouse. So many friends, and strangers, have told me that they’ve been praying for their future husband or wife since they were in high school. I’m a little late to the pray-for-your-spouse-party… but better late than never. Anyway, while I was looking for a prayer, I came across this post. This woman talked about asking God confidently for what you want. I know God created me to be married, He’s written it upon my heart since I was little. I fell in love with this woman’s prayer and I am claiming it as my own these days:

Lord, You created me. And I believe you created me for marriage. I don’t know the timeline, but I’m asking You to fulfill my desire to be married. Thank You, Lord, for this strong desire You’ve placed in my heart. Thank You that You’ve already been where I’m headed and that You know what my future holds. Thank You for marriage and for my future mate. Please be with him and prepare his heart to do Your will.

I’m sticking to that prayer for awhile :) And for now, I’m enjoying my Friday night at home, watching the Kentucky/Louisville game. I’m sure my night will end in tears either way, hopefully, they’re tears of joy over UK’s win! GO CATS! xo





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